Saturday, October 03, 2009

Somebody help!

About 7.30 this morning. A cold breeze is blowing & I'm sitting in
front of Party House swatting away flies that land on my legs. Despite
all I know about this place, I'm still wearing shorts. Maybe I'm just
used to them.
I have a bit of a headache, I've no idea why. My roommate just said
hello. I waved back, but remembered that last night, he asked someone,
'she Dipo na human being?'. It feels difficult to stay positive here.
More & more, this place shows me my flaws all too clearly: my tendency
to look for a crutch, to lay blame, to find excuses, my selfishness,
indecisiveness...my dirty laundry is being exposed. So far, however,
only I see it.
I've been sleeping with someone - literally. At least half of my
room's population is made up of corpers yet to relocate to their
places of primary assignment. One used to be in my platoon. On the
strength of that, and because there was no other free space in the
room with a mosquito net, I invited him to sleep with me on my bed -
and have been regretting it since. Mostly due to my reduced personal
space. It sometimes makes me consider him a nuisance. Now they won't
be leaving until after clearance. Yay. Be still, my expectant heart.
Someone once said it seems to be a crime to supply power to this part
of the state. I remember someone telling me she was posted to a place
where there's power 12 hours daily. I wish that were me.
I feel I'm slowly going crazy here. On the 1st, people were playing
draughts around this time. Shows what the place is like. I've cooked &
eaten out of boredom a couple of times.
I really wish I've something upbeat & positive to say, but it's hard
enough not being actively destructive. There are some good things
about here - you'd be suprised just how many potatoes I got for N100
here; or some of the kids where I teach.
Well, I've gotta go now. I've run down my phone battery writing this.
Have a great weekend.

--
Sent from my mobile device

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